Megan posted this today:

I've been trying to think of what to write, but nothing makes sense to me right now and the words just can't come together to describe what I am feeling right now. Thank you everyone for you amazing support, we cannot thank you enough.
And to my Carter
I love you more than I can express, and I miss you so much already. My arms are aching to hold you once more, I feel so lost without you. My dush, my professor, my boy. You are so amazingly strong, and had every right to be tired. You are a brave hero and you are able to sleep peacefully now, and being pain free is helping mommy and daddy so much.
Until we meet again my dear boy. I love you forever and for always

In honor of Carter and his amazing life many of us will be releasing orange and blue balloons on his first birthday. He was born March 19, 2011 at 5:36pm. Thanks

Another Angel in heaven

This morning Carter lost his battle with cancer. Please pray for Megan and her family :(

Meg's update on Friday, February 17

Carter update, long:
im sorry its taken so long, but this is very hard to type and to talk about

cant remember what my last post was, so ill just start from the results of the biopsy of the tumor. Carter is in relapse. these tumors are from the same cancer carter was initaially diagnosed with. sadly, this lessens his odds ofsurvival. The doctors said that he didnt fully go into remission like they thought. the chemo he was recieving before was only keeping the tumors at bay. carter had an MRI in late november that showed no tumors at all. The drs say that the tumors he hasnow grew as soon as the chemo was out of his system. meaning many tumors, including the brain tumor that covered 25% of his brain, grew within a month. Doctors are very concerned that giving him chemo is just prolonging the inevitable (sp?) and that even if he goes into remission again, the same things will happen. im trying so so so hard to keep a positive outlook on things, but every time we turn around the past week, the odds just get worse and worse

over the last few days have not been very good days.
Carter was able to recieve low dose chemo to keep the tumors at bay. a few days ago, he started getting really fussy, so they gave him a bolus (aflush of morphine, he is on low dose continual morphine for migrains due to the brain surgery and also to help relieve some pain from the cluster of tumors on his spine and the remaining portion of the brain tumor) but the bolus didnt work. he continued to become more and more unsettlable. a few hours goes by and all he does is scream and grunt. The doctors ended up giving him adivan (to help settle his nerves) that didnt work either. By this point there is nothing that can settle him. doctors sent stool, urine and blood samples out and a few days later (and nothing is working for pain or to settle him -he is either screaming of sleeping because he has exhausted himself) all samples came back clear. so by the third day the doctors (and me and allan) are beside ourselves and haveno ideawhat is wrong with Carter. So the doctors sent him for an MRI today.
results came back right away.
good news- the tumors have not grown or spread anymore
semi-bad news- fluid has gathered in place where the part of the tumor was removed.this fluid isnt enough to need to be drained, and is common with brain surgery. also, the doctor thinks carter has whats called "phantom pain" which means his brain is tricking him into thinking that the tumor is still all there (because of the fluid) and is causing fake pressure and pain. the doctors have started him on a "neurological pain killer" so that this fake pain stops. it will take a few days to have full effect
they also started his first round of chemo yesterday (thursday)
they have only planned two rounds so far and then and MRI then we decide what the next steps are

thank you mommas for being so supportive
we need it more now than ever
-meg

Megan's final update for a while :(

For the last 8 months I was dreading this most.
Carter has gone into relapse and has a brain tumor. They were able to remove over 50% of it. But there are also other tuners wrapping around his spine that cannot be removed. They will try chemo. But the issue with that is they are afraid he will not survive long enough to get chemo. They have to wait for him to heal from brain surgery in order to do chemo. We have been told that he could pass at any time, or in weeks.

There are alot of details that are very hard for me to type only iPhone.
The short version is
We thought he was constipated, went to the ER a few times, then nothing was adding up and one of his symptoms were making them think of neuromuscular problems, so they did a CT scan. They found a tumor covering a quarter of his brain and more cluttering around his spine. Them we were given a decision to operate, hopefully remove the large tumor, and relieve pressure, hope that they can figure out what type of tumor is is and a small possibly of chemo if he survives long enough to heal from the surgery, and prolong the inevitable. Or, not have surgery and just make him comfortable until he passes.
We made the decision to operate and have a tiny chance.
We have now found out that he has relapsed. Which is less in his favor as most infants with AML do not survive. They only thing we can hope for and donor is keep him comfortable.
I really don't know how to end this post.
I am sorry that you had to read this horrible news. But I am eternally greatful for all of the love and support you have all given to us.
I will be taking a break for a while, as I need as much time with him as I can get.
I love you all
Thank you
-Meg 

(Posted to BBC on 02/10/12)

Update

Update: Carter had a good day today, he's still very tired and sore, but was able to eat a total of 10 oz today!! Way to go buddy!! Keep making us proud!

*each minute is an extreme blessing that we will cherish forever. We love you prof *

(Posted by Megan to facebook on 02/07/2012)

Out of surgery!

Carters surgery went well, they were able to remove most of the large tumor. He was kept sedated last night because he is incubated, and should be waking up over the next few days.
Carter still has a long fight to go, and we can just hope and pray that he comes out the champion
Thank you all for your support, it helps us keep going

(Posted by Megan to facebook on 2/07/2011)

In surgery

Carter is currently surgery so send up as many prayers as you can muster!