Meg's update on Friday, February 17

Carter update, long:
im sorry its taken so long, but this is very hard to type and to talk about

cant remember what my last post was, so ill just start from the results of the biopsy of the tumor. Carter is in relapse. these tumors are from the same cancer carter was initaially diagnosed with. sadly, this lessens his odds ofsurvival. The doctors said that he didnt fully go into remission like they thought. the chemo he was recieving before was only keeping the tumors at bay. carter had an MRI in late november that showed no tumors at all. The drs say that the tumors he hasnow grew as soon as the chemo was out of his system. meaning many tumors, including the brain tumor that covered 25% of his brain, grew within a month. Doctors are very concerned that giving him chemo is just prolonging the inevitable (sp?) and that even if he goes into remission again, the same things will happen. im trying so so so hard to keep a positive outlook on things, but every time we turn around the past week, the odds just get worse and worse

over the last few days have not been very good days.
Carter was able to recieve low dose chemo to keep the tumors at bay. a few days ago, he started getting really fussy, so they gave him a bolus (aflush of morphine, he is on low dose continual morphine for migrains due to the brain surgery and also to help relieve some pain from the cluster of tumors on his spine and the remaining portion of the brain tumor) but the bolus didnt work. he continued to become more and more unsettlable. a few hours goes by and all he does is scream and grunt. The doctors ended up giving him adivan (to help settle his nerves) that didnt work either. By this point there is nothing that can settle him. doctors sent stool, urine and blood samples out and a few days later (and nothing is working for pain or to settle him -he is either screaming of sleeping because he has exhausted himself) all samples came back clear. so by the third day the doctors (and me and allan) are beside ourselves and haveno ideawhat is wrong with Carter. So the doctors sent him for an MRI today.
results came back right away.
good news- the tumors have not grown or spread anymore
semi-bad news- fluid has gathered in place where the part of the tumor was removed.this fluid isnt enough to need to be drained, and is common with brain surgery. also, the doctor thinks carter has whats called "phantom pain" which means his brain is tricking him into thinking that the tumor is still all there (because of the fluid) and is causing fake pressure and pain. the doctors have started him on a "neurological pain killer" so that this fake pain stops. it will take a few days to have full effect
they also started his first round of chemo yesterday (thursday)
they have only planned two rounds so far and then and MRI then we decide what the next steps are

thank you mommas for being so supportive
we need it more now than ever
-meg